Year: 1994 - 2008

The years that i spent with him. Although we have no blood connection, he still bring us up. Give us what we need/ want, shower us with the love that other kids have. Try to give us the best..... But when I'm young, so stupid of me doing stupid things, saying stupid words & also stupid action. End up getting myself into trouble. Still remember its in year 1997. But he didn't give up on me, try to talk to me every 2 weeks for a period of 2 yrs. i could say, even for those who has blood connection may not be even doing all this. Still remember him sending me to camp everyday from Sengkang to Jalan Bahar every morning. Instead of sleeping longer, he choose to send me to camp. At that time i feel normal.But now......

Date: 12/ 04 / 2008
Time: 19:12

Watching him become weaker & weaker each day for the past 1 week, From a very healthy man to the un-believable state that i can never imagine. The whole week he has been fighting against his sickness, but seems like he lose..... Never knew it will become so serious, if only we can go against his wish from don't visit a doctor for check up, i believe there is still hope.

Sent him to SGH in the Saturday morning, he had to stay in ICU for further check up & more observation. The whole day we (my family, relatives & friends) had been spending our time there waiting & waiting, till a doctor came to us and told ask the seriousness of his sickness. She also told us to be prepared for the worst.

Given chances to visit him in the ICU, saw him struggling on the bed with so many tube poke on his body, & also 1 into his lung through his mouth. Watching him lying there motionless, but can tell from his eyes expression that he is in the pain. For the whole day, his heart beat had stop for 4 times, but doctors manage to save the 4times. When it come to the fifth, there is nothing that they can do. Watching most of them crying, especially my family. mum, both sister & niece, i told myself to hold back my tears. I had to be strong & accept the facts. But still there is time i cant control.

Neither did mum give up, kept calling him come back. Seeing mum like that really breaks our heart. At the moment, i really don't know what to say to her......

Date: 15/ 04/ 2008

Its the fourth day of the funeral, which is the last night & also my 25birthday, light up a joss stick & told him many many things in front of his altar. Kinda sad, never expect my birthday for this year would have this kind of memory.

Date:16/ 04/ 2008

Ready to send him for cremation ceremony, don't know how to describe my feeling for that day. Anyway just wanna be strong. Overall I'm the only guy in the family now.....

The him & he mentioned above is referring to my step father. Had never regard him as a step father before, treat him as my real 1. Because everything he did is more than what we expected. He had done his duty as a father, but i feel very ashamed..... Cause we did not let him live in comfort before he leave this world. For now i really do hope he can rest in peace.

Thanks for all the love u showered us this fews years, we will never forget. Although we never mention, but hope you know that we will always respect & also love you.......